The CooperKripke Re-Match
by notjaneausten
Summary: Kripke and Sheldon have to collaborate on another grant paper and when Sheldon misses their scheduled meeting Kripke decides to track him down...what he finds in Sheldon's office shocks the whole gang. Disclaimer: All TBBT characters remain the property of Chuck Lorre & Bill Prady.
1. Chapter 1

Once again, Barry Kripke was being forced to work with the egotistical Sheldon Cooper on a combined paper for the university and once again, Sheldon wasn't keeping his end of the bargain. Kripke looked at his watch again and sighed, it was now nearly forty five minutes after Sheldon was supposed to have met him in the lab and Kripke decided it was time to track the weasel down.

He met up with Cooper's young assistant Alex who was standing outside of Sheldon's office door looking extremely puzzled.

"Good afternoon, Alex. Fancy meeting you here." Kripke turned on the charm and Alex looked over in surprise.

"Doctor Kripke, I thought that you and Doctor Cooper were working in the lab this afternoon?"

"I thought so too, but it appears we are both wrong." Kripke tried turning the knob on the door only to find it locked. "You have a key for his office don't you?" He asked Alex and she shook her head.

"No, only Doctor Cooper has a key to his office, he's very private about his research and doesn't like it left unlocked unless he is inside. I thought I heard voices as I was walking past but thought it was strange as I knew he'd already booked this afternoon out with you. I was about to knock on the door when you arrived." Alex looked over at Kripke who puffed out his chest a little in a display of manliness.

"Hey, Cooper! You in there or what?" Kripke pounded on the door and the both listened for any sounds of activity. There were distinct murmurs coming from inside and the rustling of papers being shoved together.

"Hey guys, what's up?" Leonard, Howard and Raj appeared along the corridor and noticed Kripke and Alex standing outside of Sheldon's office. "Did any of you see what happened to Sheldon at lunchtime? We were expecting him in the cafeteria but he never showed up…that was more than two hours ago and we were getting a little worried."

"He's not answering his phone or checking his e-mails." Raj interjected after checking his blackberry again for any response to the last five messages sent. Kripke and Alex exchanged worried looks; they both knew how important this paper was to the scientific community and how anal Sheldon was about maintaining his strict schedule. That fact that he'd not only missed out on lime jello in the cafeteria, but not responded to any text or e-mails or kept his pre-booked time on the super computer with Kripke made them all feel slightly uneasy.

"What should we do, bust it down?" Leonard asked around, only for Howard to snort in amusement.

"You couldn't even bust your way out of a paper bag without getting an asthma attack. Let me go back to the lab and pick up my tools. Sheldon's lock has a magnetic override in cases of emergency; I think this qualifies, don't you?" Howard was about to head off down the corridor, when the unmistakable sound of the lock snicking open from the inside had them all holding their breath as the door slowly opened to reveal…Amy stepping out with a picnic basket over her arm.

"Ooh, a little afternoon delight with the girlfriend…" Kripke snapped sarcastically as he stepped forward to brush past Amy to storm into Sheldon's office. "You can't fool me that easily again, Cooper! You tried to fob me off with that excuse last time, but that won't work anymore now that I know that you've never even seen your girlfriend without her clothes on…heck, you'd probably run a mile in the other direction!"

"Watch it, Kripke! That's my boyfriend you're talking about here!" Amy stepped back into the office and the blaze of battle lit behind her emerald eyes. "I'll have you know that beneath that seemingly positronic exterior beats a fully functioning man…" Amy's eyes drifted over Sheldon's crotch before lazily travelling up to meet his gaze. "Catch you later, commander."

"Lieutenant." Sheldon inclined his head and watched as Amy sashayed her way out of the office and waved goodbye to Leonard, Howard and Raj who were standing gobsmacked in the hallway.

"Dude! She totally TNG'd on you!" Raj exclaimed, holding his fist out toward Sheldon, and even more surprised when Sheldon tapped him lightly in return.

"I know." Sheldon nodded solemnly, quoting Han Solo from his favourite Star Wars movie. He then cracked a beaming smile at his friends. "Ain't she great?" He turned around to scoop some papers into a folder and shoved them into Kripke's arms. "Here's the stuff, I would have brought them over earlier but Amy surprised me with a picnic and time just slipped away from me."

"Excuse me? I don't understand – 'positronic brain' and 'TNG'? Is this kind of nerdy Star Wars secret language thing?" Kripke clutched the folder to his chest and shook his head, not understanding a word of what had just been said.

"Dude; Star Trek: The Next Generation, look up the episode 'The Naked Now'. If you can't figure it out from that, then you have no place in science at all." Raj shook his head sadly at the thought of a renowned physicist not even getting a simple Star Trek reference. The guys watched as Sheldon continued to pack his messenger bag as if he were preparing to leave for the day; looking at their watches they saw it was only three in the afternoon – it was unprecedented for Sheldon to leave the office before five o'clock at the earliest and that was because that was the time that Leonard usually left and he needed a ride home.

"Sheldon, are you okay?" Leonard asked quietly as Sheldon packed his laptop away and Sheldon looked up in surprise.

"Of course, Leonard. Why do you ask?"

"It's only three o'clock and you always stay until five; you missed lime jello at lunch and you completely missed out on your session on the super computer…Sheldon, I was worried about you."

"Oh, you little nervous Nellie. No need to worry about missing lime jello, Amy gave me a wonderful dessert with her picnic." Sheldon smiled up at Leonard which made him feel awkward and uncomfortable at seeing Sheldon's koala face used in reference to his girlfriend. "Alex, there's no need for you to hang around any longer today; in fact why don't you take tomorrow off as well. I'm not going to be in the office, so there really isn't any requirement for your presence."

"Oh, did I miss something in your diary? I wasn't aware that you had anything booked for this afternoon or tomorrow." Alex twisted her fingers nervously, hoping that she hadn't overlooked something important.

"It's May the fourth tomorrow, Alex. I never work on May the fourth." Sheldon looked up in amazement at his assistant, before shaking his head slightly. "Oh, I forgot you weren't working here last year. Myself, Dr. Hoftstedter, Dr. Koothrappali and Mr. Wolowitz have a long standing tradition that we all get together to celebrate Star Wars day."

"You whack jobs really sit around your apartment watching all six of those dumb movies all day?" Kripke sighed as he went to leave the office. "You people really don't know how to have a good time."

"'Naked Now', Barry. Don't forget to check it out." Howard called down the corridor as Kripke took Sheldon's work back to his lab to compare against his own findings. Leonard was still looking at Sheldon pack the last of his things into his messenger bag and placing the strap carefully across his body.

"You really leaving early today, Sheldon? You know I can't leave early tonight, and you don't even have your bus pants with you."

"It's quite all right, Leonard. Amy is leaving early this afternoon as well and has very kindly offered to drive me back to the apartment. I believe we shall also be calling into the supermarket to collect the necessary snack selections for tomorrow, so if anyone has any special requirements please text me within the next hour and I will add it to the list. I assume everyone will be joining us for dinner this evening as per our usual arrangements?" Sheldon looked around and everyone nodded. "Very well, if you excuse me I wouldn't want to keep Amy waiting for too long." Sheldon urged everyone out of the door and he carefully locked it behind him; ignoring Howard and Raj's sniggers of laughter behind his back.

"Yeah, I mean he's only kept her waiting for three years already; what's another ten minutes gonna hurt?" Raj giggled at Howard's not so subtle reference to the length of time that Sheldon and Amy had been dating for without seeing a single kiss being exchanged between the couple. Leonard was facing in the opposite direction and just happened to catch the brief smirk that flittered across Sheldon's face before his lanky room-mate disappeared down the corridor and out into the parking lot.

"Um guys…you may want to re-visit that TNG episode yourself as a little memory refresher. In case you didn't hear, Amy called Sheldon 'Commander' just as she left and I distinctly heard him whisper 'Lieutenant' back to her."

"Leonard, you mean you really think that we interrupted a little 'afternoon delight' for real? I thought Kripke was just messing with us, especially after that stunt Sheldon pulled with him last time." Howard looked at Raj who looked at Leonard with the same expression of shock at the thought of the Shamy finally getting some action.

"I suggest we watch them closely at dinner tonight, I can always tell when Sheldon's been 'thinking improper thoughts' as his Mother would say. He gets that little twitch near his eye and his ears get a little red." Leonard suggested and the three men wandered back to their own offices, each thinking how weird it sounded; Sheldon and Amy actually interacting of a physical level...

**AN: I wasn't sure whether to leave this as just a one shot or not... drop me a review and let me know whether you'd like to see it develop any further**


	2. Chapter 2

An hour later Leonard pulled his phone out of his pocket when it started to vibrate with an incoming call. He checked the display to see that it was a call from his girlfriend and closest neighbour, Penny.

"Hey Penny, what's up?" Leonard asked cheerfully and was greeted by the garbled choking of Penny instead of her usual greeting. "Penny…calm down and breathe. Are you okay? Did something happen?"

"Sh-Sh-Sheldon!" Penny finally managed to choke out and Leonard sat down quickly in his chair.

"Something happened to Sheldon? Is he okay? He left early today and said he was going shopping with Amy…do you want me to come home? Is he in the hospital…Oh God! I'll call the guys and we'll be there as soon as we can." Leonard started to panic and felt like his wheezy lungs were about to explode. He started to grab his notes from his desk and stuff them ruthlessly into his messenger bag, not caring whether they were in the right order or that they were now hopelessly wrinkled.

"Leonard…Leonard! Sit down!" Penny's strident tone cut through his daze and from the sound of things it wasn't the first time she had tried to get his attention. "Put me on Skype."

"Okay, hang on." Leonard set the phone down on his bench and opened his laptop to connect the call. Penny accepted the invitation and they disconnected the phone call. Leonard looked at Penny's face on the screen; she was wearing her waitress uniform from The Cheesecake Factory and he remembered that she was on the lunchtime and afternoon shift that day. "Penny, why aren't you at work? I thought you didn't finish until nearly seven?"

"I went in but they sent me home because I had a bit of an upset stomach…I knew I shouldn't have brought home that leftover cheesecake last night." Penny rubbed her stomach and grimaced as she remembered polishing of the leftovers in bed the previous evening. "I bet it was from the weekend and not yesterday like they promised."

"Are you okay now?" Leonard asked in concern. It wasn't like Penny to make a big deal out of any slight illness and he knew that she was trying to save up the cash for a new car, so was trying to increase her hours by taking on more shifts in the bar in addition to her waitressing shifts.

"A bit…anyway, I thought about what Sheldon said he gave you whenever your lactose thingy flares up and decide to pop over to your place to grab a couple of those white ginger tea bags. I opened the door with the emergency key and was nearly half way across the living room when…" Penny stopped talking suddenly, as the image of what she had witnessed flashed through her mind once again.

"When…what?"

"Let's just say that I will probably never be able to look Sheldon in the eye ever again."

"PENNY! WHAT DID YOU SEE?" Leonard yelled into the screen, his voice loud enough to attract Howard who was working in the lab a few doors down. Howard came running along the corridor to see Leonard scraping his hands through his hair as he waited for Penny to uncover her eyes.

"I can't even begin to describe it…Sheldon was…it was…"

"Penny, just take a deep breath and tell me what is going on."

"Sheldon was dressed up as Data…but he was half naked!"

"So he had his shirt off, big deal. You've rubbed vaporub on his chest before." Leonard couldn't see what the issue was, Penny had looked after Sheldon when he was sick on a few occasions and after being with Leonard on and off and on again relationship over the last five years had also seen Sheldon in various stages of undress – none of it at all suggestively.

"It wasn't his chest that was the naked part!" Penny screamed out and covered her eyes again, as if trying to rid herself of the memory.

"Oh…" Leonard screwed up his nose and closed his eyes. Howard started to chuckle from the doorway and came into the lab to peer at the screen.

"Tell me Penny, did he scream as loudly as you did just then? I bet he covered himself up and cried like a little girl."

"He was screaming all right, but it had nothing to do with me…" Penny said darkly as she looked straight at Howard. "I scrammed out of there as soon as I could, I don't even think that they even realised I was there."

"They? Do you mean to say that you walked in on Sheldon and Amy having a little cosplay action? Was she wearing a uniform as well? Maybe a security yellow jumpsuit?" Howard leant in closer to the screen as he pressed for details. He turned to Leonard and looked over in amazement. "Maybe Raj was right and their lunchtime date was a little afternoon delight that we walked in on? What if it wasn't another ruse to throw Kripke off track?"

"What are you guys talking about? Did Sheldon try to use Amy as an excuse again with that odious guy with the speech impediment?" Penny frowned as she remembered the fallout from the last incident.

"Kind of…Sheldon missed his session on the mainframe with Kripke because Amy brought him a surprise picnic. Kripke and Alex were banging on Sheldon's office door, Amy opened it up and made some comment about Sheldon's positronic brain. Raj assumed that she was talking about how Tasha Yar and Data hooked up one time on Star Trek: The Next Generation." Leonard explained quickly as Howard flicked through his phone to hold up a picture to the laptop screen.

"Was she wearing anything like this?"

"Yeah, they were wearing matching tops… I don't want to think about it anymore." Penny held up a hand to block out the image on Howard's phone and he put it back in his pocket before nodding at Leonard.

"Yup, they were totally role playing out his secret fantasy. So, you think that was their first time?"

"What doing the deed or dressing up?" Penny asked, and caught the slight twitch on Leonard's face as she spoke. "Leonard, what do you know?"

"Well, I can't answer the question about whether it was their first time having sex; but I do know that Amy has rather a nice looking Nurse Chapel outfit from The Original Series that she's worn for Sheldon a couple of times…I kinda walked in on them once when she was giving him a medical scan. I backed straight out of the apartment and slept on Raj's couch for the night."

"Nice…" Howard murmured, Bernadette wasn't one for dressing up for Howard; whenever they appeared in costume it was usually wearing something that she had picked out for them. As much as he appreciated the Catholic school girl outfits, he would rather it had been Princess Leia's slave girl bikini or Deanna Troi's skimpy uniform skirt.

"Guys, they're still over there! I can hear them through the walls,,," Penny winced as she opened up her front door and slid the laptop closer to the door of 4A.

"Oh, Commander!"

"Lieutenant!"

The muttered groans and shouts were clear enough to make even Leonard look a little startled. Penny picked up the laptop again and scuttled back into her apartment, slamming the door behind her.

"Penny, it can't go on for much longer. It's nearly five and Sheldon knows that I get home around five fifteen; you've just got to wait it out a little, okay?"

"Okay – but I'm not happy about it. It's enough to put a girl off sex for life!"

"Penny, you've been wanting them to move on with their relationship for ages. Why the sudden change of heart?"

"Leonard, it's like walking in on your parents having sex; you know it happens but you don't expect to see them going at it in the living room!"

"Were they on the floor, up against the wall or…in Sheldon's spot?" Howard leant forward again, rubbing his hands expectantly; eager for any of the dirty details.

"That's just gross, Howard! I don't ask you for all of the details about where you and Bernadette have done it." Penny wrinkled up her nose at his eagerness and Leonard punched him lightly on the arm.

"Hey, I just asked what everyone else is likely to be thinking. Come on, Penny – just tell me a little bit…"

"I don't wanna…" Penny whined and jerked her eyes over to the door as a particularly loud cry was heard echoing through the walls. "Man, that was a loud one…I'm gonna need to borrow those noise cancelling headphones if ever they have a sleepover."

"Never happen." Leonard assured her, and when Howard looked over with raised eyebrows Leonard simply shrugged. "Sheldon thinks that everyone is at work this afternoon, he told us that he and Amy were getting supplies for tomorrow. So I think that when I get home I will find a few carefully placed bags on the counter containing Red Vines, Milk Duds and Yoo Hoo's in the fridge. He would be mortified if he thought that Penny was at home, and would probably leave the state if he ever imagined that you could hear him and the country if he ever found out that you'd seen him in the act. This is a man that sings when he pee's because he doesn't want anyone to hear him."

"Good point." Howard stated to Leonard and then turned back to Penny as a sudden thought raced through his mind, "So, Penny when are you going to tell him that saw them in fragrante delicto?"

"Never!"

"Please?"

"Howard, no! I want to wipe the memory of that image out of my head forever, zip, gone!"

"Spoilsport."

"Howard, let me just say one thing that I will hope shut you up on the subject forever…"

"Yes? Go on?"

"Let's just say that…" Penny looked Howard up and down and then winked to Leonard. "Size really is proportional…and that Amy will never want to look at another man again!" With that comment and a little smirk at Howard, Penny disconnected and left the diminutive aerospace engineer staring blankly at the screen.

"What was that supposed to mean?" Leonard chuckled as he patted his friend on the shoulder.

"Howard, think of the size of Sheldon's feet and hands and then think about a certain old wives tale…you know the one about telling the size of your equipment?"

"Oh…OHHH!" Howard's eyebrows nearly reached his hairline as he finally put two and two together. "Man, that's an image that I don't need burning into my brain."

"Now you know how Penny feels." Leonard remarked as he slipped his laptop back into his bag and turned to leave the lab, flicking off the light switches as he went. "Are you staying over the night at my Sheldon's, or are you gonna drive back over with Raj in the morning?"

"Hmm, do you think that Amy is likely to stay over tonight?"

"Doubt it, I don't think Sheldon's invited any of the girls to join us tomorrow; it's a week day so they are probably planning on working anyway. I know Penny's working the afternoon/evening shift at the bar, so she will probably just sleep in until eleven and then go straight in."

"In that case I'll probably catch a ride over with Raj in the morning. See you at dinner?"

"Yeah, see you." They parted ways at the end of the corridor, Howard walking off to the parking lot and Leonard calling in to see catch Raj up on the latest news. When he got to Raj's office, it was to find that he'd already left for the day and Alex, Sheldon's assistant filled him in.

"Oh, Doctor Hofstadter…Doctor Koothrappali left about an hour ago, he mentioned something about taking Cinnamon over to Mrs. Wolowitz's for a sleepover."

"Okay, thanks Alex."

"No problem. Enjoy your day off tomorrow."

"Always do…and May the Fourth be with you!" Leonard waved as he walked out of the building, Alex watched him go with a bemused expression on her face. She shook her head as she dropped some paperwork off in Doctor Gablehauser's office.

"Oh, Miss Jenson. Are those the papers from Doctor Cooper?" Doctor Gablehauser, the head of the Physics department was locking up his inner office as Alex slipped the papers into the tray on his secretary's desk.

"Yes sir, and there's one there from Doctor Koothrappali as well."

"Wonderful news, and even better for you and the rest of us now that we don't have to see the awesome foursome until Monday."

"'Awesome foursome'?" Alex repeated, not having heard the term before.

"Let me walk you out and I'll fill you in." Doctor Gablehauser held open the outer door for Alex and they walked through the empty halls together as he filled her in. "The 'Awesome Foursome' is what the tenure committee like to refer Doctor's Cooper, Koothrappali and Hofstadter as, along with Mr. Wolowitz. Those four can cause trouble where there is none, it was even worse when Doctor Winkle was around; she managed to bring out the worst in them, especially Doctor Cooper. Trust me, Alex – it will be like a party around here tomorrow; it's the same for every May 4th, San Diego Comic-Con, or whenever there's a new Marvel or Star Trek movie out."

"But why?"

"Because, my dear Miss Jenson, we are guaranteed to be free of those meddlesome creatures for at least ten days every single year! Do you know how difficult it is to persuade Doctor Cooper that he needs to take a vacation?" Gablehauser saw the flicker of horror on Alex's face and knew that she'd heard tales of his forced vacation in which he had tried to latch on to everyone else's projects for a few days; thank heavens that he'd finally found refuge in Doctor Fowler's laboratory and stopped pestering everyone else. The complaints box in Gablehauser's office had been nearly overflowing that week.

"Goodness knows they are four of the most brilliant minds I have ever come across and the publicity alone is worth every torturous minute – but I love it even more when they all take time off together. I never turn down their request for leave, no matter how bizarre the reason – Doctor Cooper even has it written in his contract that he must always be absent every May 4th, and for a man whose last research paper netting this University further money to fund another four years grant money…who am I to argue?" Gablehauser paused at his car and looked over at Alex. "I know Doctor Cooper has offered you a day off tomorrow, you can still take it if you like, but I think you'll find it a whole new experience if you come in and see what the place is like without him here…We have the television on in the lounge, music playing in the canteen…they even serve lunch with a smile in the cafeteria!"

"Sounds great, I do have some work to finish up in the office. Doctor Cooper only told me of his plans this afternoon, so I wasn't expecting to take the day off anyway."

"I'll see you tomorrow then, Miss Jenson. Good evening."

"Good evening." Alex watched Gablehauser drive off, his stereo turned on full blast and smiled to herself as she got into her own car; already looking forward to what tomorrow had to offer.


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Okay, time to get things a little more realistic…come on, you didn't really think that Sheldon would have defiled his beloved spot did you? One word for you…Bazinga!**

Leonard walked up the last few stairs and hovered on the landing outside his apartment, with his keys in his hand. He hesitated slightly before pressing his ear against the door, listening for any signs of carnal activity from inside.

_"__Permission to come aboard, Lieutenant?"_

_"__Permission granted commander."_

"Oh great, they're at it again." Leonard stepped quickly away from the door as he heard the distinct sounds of a Star Trek role play being played out from inside the apartment. He hustled his way back down the stairs, only to crash into Howard and Raj who were just about to turn the corner of the stairwell. "Let's take a walk around the block for a few minutes." Leonard suggested as he tried to get the guys to turn around.

"You don't mean? Surely not..? Sheldon knew that we were coming over and it's gone six." Howard smirked at the idea that the high and mighty Sheldon Cooper would have let his hormones get the better of him. "Let me take a listen." Howard jogged up the remaining stairs and crouched near the keyhole so that he could hear what was going on.

_"__Engage forward thrusters at half speed."_

"Yup, that's Sheldon alright." Howard muttered as he heard Sheldon's excited tones clearly through the door. "He's not exactly being to discrete."

_"__Oooh, is that your hyperdrive?"_

"And that's Amy…Sheldon's now murmuring something about how he loves it when she talks all sci fi with him…"

"But she's got her Star Wars and Star Trek all mixed up!" Raj complained as he crept closer and Howard shushed him.

"At least he's got a girlfriend that doesn't think Spock is 'the doctor with pointy ears'…"

"Spock wasn't a doctor!" Raj and Leonard exclaimed loudly and Howard nearly fell backwards as the apartment door opened to reveal an excited Sheldon…holding a small figure of the starship Enterprise in his hand.

"Oh my God! Is that what I think it is?" Leonard's jaw dropped open and he stepped forward to get a closer look. "It's not possible…"

"Ain't it great! Now granted, it isn't Lego, but it's near enough!" Sheldon let the guys look at the figure but hugged it closer when anyone got too near. "Amy ordered it for me as a surprise and it came today. And get this…she's got a friend that makes custom built models and he's emailed her a parts list so that we can make a bigger version…out of Lego! We're going to go through my bricks a little later and she's agreed to take me to the store so that I can get anything else that I don't have."

"But what is that if it isn't Lego?" Raj pointed at the figure in Sheldon's hand and Sheldon grinned.

"It's Kre-O…She got me a transporter model as well that lights up and it even came with little 'Scotty' figure!"

"Lucky bastard." Howard muttered as he gazed longingly at the model. "Bernie won't let me keep any of my Lego kits at our place, I have to go over to Ma's whenever I get the urge to build."

"Are you fella's coming in for dinner, or are you just going to eat out in the hall tonight?" Amy's amused tone from the doorway had everyone looking over to see that she'd set the cartons out on the coffee table and was sitting in the armchair waiting for them to come in. Sheldon turned around and settled himself in his usual spot, placing his model carefully on the telephone table out of reach. Raj grabbed the desk chair with Howard moving over to Amy's usual spot and Leonard in the far right of the couch.

"Bernie called a few minutes ago, she's running a little late; so I've left her beef and broccoli in the microwave." Amy tapped her phone and Howard nodded.

"Yeah, she had a last minute meeting with drug approval board this afternoon; I guess it ran later than she thought." Howard grabbed his carton and everyone followed suit.

"Penny texted me to say that she was feeling better, so she's picked up another shift behind the bar. She'll grab her noodles when she gets back and reheat them for supper." Leonard forked up a piece of beef and then gave it a slight sniff when he caught a whiff of something unexpected. "Can I smell Purell on these cushions?"

"Yes, Amy sneezed and so I had to sanitise the whole couch." Sheldon said quickly as he took another bite of his meal.

"That's why he won't let me sit next to him this evening, I've been banished to the chair and ordered to keep at least five feet away." Amy sipped her tea and continued. "I tried to tell him that it was just a reaction to the displays of flowers at the market but Sheldon wanted to be absolutely certain that I wasn't carrying a certifiable disease. If I haven't sneezed again in the next two hours, he may reconsider and let me sit next to him tomorrow." Leonard had heard some fantastical stories in his time, but this elaborate tale was the icing on the cake and screamed Sheldon's influence. He decided to watch them carefully for the rest of the evening to see whether either of them let any signs of their intimate status show.

"Are you all set for tomorrow, Sheldon?" Raj asked as he picked up the transporter model box and glanced at the pictures.

"Oh indeed, Amy kindly helped me decide which t-shirt to wear."

"Ooh…you've finally let a girl in your room!" Leonard leant forward, finally something worth listening to…

"Don't be silly, Leonard…Amy gave me her opinion from the hallway, you know girls aren't allowed in my room." Sheldon shook his head slightly as he continued to eat and Leonard slumped back against the cushions, disappointment etched on his face.

"Is everything alright, Leonard?" Amy asked from the armchair, "You seem a little disheartened this evening."

"No, I'm okay…No, actually I'm not…" Leonard set his plate back down on the table and glanced over at Sheldon. "The two of you have been acting weirder than normal today…first with Kripke and then Penny said the two of you were…"

"Yes?" Sheldon glanced over at his roommate and raised his eyebrow expectantly. "Were…?"

"Doing the nasty on the couch! You were half naked, Sheldon!"

"Oh boy…" Sheldon's face flushed as he rested his chopsticks on the edge of his plate and glanced over at his girlfriend, who looked amused at his discomfort. "Amy…"

"Yes, Sheldon?"

"A little help please?"

"Funny…that's exactly what you said this afternoon. I told you we should have gone into your bedroom."

"I told you, girls aren't allowed in my room!" Sheldon replied as a matter of rote and Howard glanced between the two of them with a puzzled look.

"I though the two of you might have acted a little weirder than usual…it's not every day your neighbour walks in on you having sex on the couch."

"I beg your pardon!" Sheldon stuttered, his face turning nearly scarlet with shock and Amy's eyes widened with horror.

"We were certainly not engaging in coitus on the couch! I can't believe Penny would say such a hurtful thing!" Amy slammed her plate down on the coffee table and burst into tears, hurrying off to the bathroom to lock herself inside.

"I can't believe you would say something like that in front of Amy! To me, yes…but in front of her…completely unacceptable!" Sheldon shouted at his friends, and it was loud enough to make even Howard wince, and this was a man that was used to his neighbours hearing every little thing his mother said.

"Sheldon…Penny saw you half naked, and we all heard you through the door." Leonard explained and Sheldon clucked his tongue in disapproval.

"I don't know what Penny thought she saw, but I was certainly not half naked! Firstly, the incident with Kripke…Amy brought a picnic to my office and at the bottom of the basket was my new Enterprise model, naturally I was very excited and Amy called me Commander…after Commander Data of course because she admires my eidetic memory."

"Yeah, we kinda already got that part, we were there after all." Raj circled his hand, urging Sheldon to continue.

"After we got back from the market, Amy said it would be nice if I changed into my Data costume while we put together the model…I happened to mention that I had picked up a matching uniform for her to try on for when we next go to a couples costume party; unfortunately there was a mix up in the trousers, I ended up picking up Amy's set and ripped the seat of the pants trying to tug them on…Amy was simply trying to help me out of them when they got stuck halfway up my legs. They're over there, and I fear quite unrepairable." Sheldon pointed to where a heap of black material was draped over the edge of the couch and Leonard could just make out the narrow gold piping running down the side seam. "Amy made fun of me all afternoon and kept giggling uncontrollably whenever she called me 'Commander'."

"So…no sex then?" Howard asked disappointedly and when Sheldon growled at him, Howard reluctantly fished in his wallet to throw a twenty dollar bill over at Raj, who accepted it gleefully.

"I can't believe the two of you…" Leonard looked between his two friends, and Raj sniggered, making Leonard frown. "What?"

"Kripke just lost a hundred."

"That's just great…anything else you'd care to share while we're at it? Are you having a pool on when we're going to grace the world with our first child? Or, I know…how about how many years I'm likely to get for murdering the pair of you?" Sheldon's tone grew icy as he rose to his full height and pointed to the door. "OUT! I don't want to see the pair of you until you are suitably repentant for your actions! Go on, out! Consider yourself lucky that I don't sue you both for slander!"

"What about Penny?" Howard wanted to know how much trouble Penny would be in for starting the rumour and Sheldon just shook his head and turned back to the couch.

"What Penny did was wrong, but it was a mistake. You guys knew exactly what you were doing, and I have to say I'm a little disappointed in you both."

"That's just because we didn't ask you to be in the pool." Howard grinned, thinking that Leonard would see the funny side, but Leonard just got up from the couch and opened the front door.

"I think you'd better go now Howard, before Sheldon makes good on his murder attempt. The two of you should watch Star Wars at your own place tomorrow…give him a chance to cool off a little." Leonard stated quietly, hating the fact that his friend's had cooked up this crazy scheme. Raj hung his head shamefully and followed Howard out of the door, he glanced over his shoulder and tried to apologise but Sheldon had already made his way down the hallway to try and offer comfort to his girlfriend.

Leonard started clearing away the barely touched meal and disposing of the remains in the trash. He kept a close watch on the hallway and could hear the gentle murmurs coming from the bathroom. Sheldon made his way into the kitchen and readied two mugs with Chamomile tea bags, adding a third as Leonard coughed a little. Once the kettle had boiled, Sheldon poured the water into the waiting mugs and stirred the tea slowly.

"How is she?" Leonard asked quietly and Sheldon gave him a faint shrug.

"I explained that it was a misunderstanding on Penny's part and she saw the funny side of it…what hurt us both the most is the fact that our so called friends decided to make a mockery of the most intimate nature of our relationship; it's been hard enough for us to get where we are today without everyone treating us like bugs under a microscope."

"I'm sorry, Sheldon."

"Hey, it's not your fault…you weren't involved this time." Sheldon quirked the corner of his mouth up in an attempted smile and Leonard patted him on the shoulder.

"I think Raj is sorry he ever got dragged into it, he looked pretty ashamed of himself as he left."

"And so he should be." Sheldon muttered as he squeezed the tea bag against the side of the mug before tossing the bag in the trash.

"It's pretty ironic really."

"How so?"

"Well, everyone thinks we've been having coitus on the couch…and I haven't even had the courage to even kiss Amy properly. I want to, but haven't quite found the right moment."

"You'll get there buddy, just take things at a pace that is right for you." Leonard took one of the mugs and added a spoonful of sugar, while Sheldon added honey to his and Amy's.

"I hope so, Leonard." Sheldon picked up the mugs and headed for the hallway. "Amy is resting in my room for a while; she might stay over as she's still pretty upset and in need of comfort, are you staying here tonight or at Penny's?"

"Here I think." Leonard stated as he made his way over to the couch and flicked on the TV, he glanced up as Sheldon hovered in the hallway with the mugs in his hand. "Something wrong?"

"No…just waiting for a comment about Amy staying in my room." Sheldon said quietly, looking down at the mugs and then back over to Leonard. His roommate just smiled understandingly and turned his attention back to the TV. Sheldon's shoulders straightened up a little as he turned on his heel and made his way back into his bedroom, closing the door behind him softly.


	4. Chapter 4

"I'm sorry for inconveniencing you like this Sheldon, I know you don't approve of me being in your room. I'll just drink my tea and go home." Amy perched on the very edge of Sheldon's bed and tried to make herself as inconspicuous as possible as she took her tea from Sheldon. He looked a little startled at her statement and then took a seat on his bed, patting the mattress invitingly.

"Nonsense, it was my so called friends that upset you in the first place and you are never an inconvenience to me, Amy. Now come up here and make yourself comfortable." Sheldon had removed his shoes before sitting on the bed and now Amy did the same, neatly lining them up just under the bedframe and curling her legs to the side in a very ladylike manner as her back remained stick straight. She let out a muffled squeak as Sheldon removed the tea from her hand before tugging her up to side propped up against the pillows beside him. "That's better, now we can chat in comfort."

"Um…okay." Amy was having a little trouble believing that she, the shy, awkward Amy Farrah Fowler, was actually sitting in her boyfriend's bedroom...on his bed, in a move orchestrated by Sheldon himself! She was still a little uncomfortable sitting this close to Sheldon after the earlier revelations and kept casting glances at the bedroom door, as if expecting someone to burst in on them at any moment. Sheldon saw her nervousness, and gently laid his hand over the top of hers, curling his lean fingers into her palm.

"Don't worry, I've sent them all home; it's only Leonard and ourselves in the apartment and he's watching TV out in the living room. Just relax and enjoy your tea." Sheldon kept his tone low and soothing as he pressed Amy's tea back in her hand and then flicked on the TV with the remote control that he pulled from his nightstand drawer. He found a period drama on BBC America and settled back against the pillows, hoping that Amy would follow suit.

"Hmm…this is nice. I love a good regency period piece." Amy murmured, engrossed in the drama unfolding out on the screen. Sheldon placed their empty mugs on the nightstand and dimmed the lamp a little as they watched the TV together; slowly Amy started to relax as she slipped a little lower against the pillows and by the time the show was halfway through she was resting against Sheldon's side with her arm casually draped across his waist. Sheldon's arm was wrapped around Amy's shoulder and every so often, he would drop a sweet kiss against her hair when she sighed softly at something that one of the characters said on screen. "I should get going, it's getting late and I know you guys like to get an early start on your movie marathon." Amy reluctantly started to lift her head from Sheldon's shoulder and glanced over at the illuminated clock on the nightstand.

"You can't go yet…Darcy's just about to find out about the letter." Sheldon tugged on Amy's hand to bring her back down onto the bed, he swallowed hard as he thought about what he had told Leonard earlier. "You could always stay here tonight…with me."

"Sheldon…" Amy breathed out, barely able to focus on anything except those few whispered words. "Are you sure? I mean, what about the innuendo's that we are likely to face in the morning?"

"Raj and Howard are not coming over for the marathon…Leonard suggested that they stay away for a few days and I have to say I agree with his suggestion. They made you cry and I wanted to hit them for that." Sheldon gently ran a finger below Amy's slightly swollen eyes and tapped the tip of her still reddened nose. "No one is allowed to make my Amy cry…not even me."

"Oh Sheldon!" Amy turned her head into his shoulder, and sighed happily. Sheldon ran his hand down Amy's back in a gentle motion before resting his hand on the curve of her waist.

"I've got a t-shirt that you can change into, and I'll understand if you'd rather not spend the day with me tomorrow; I know that Star Wars is not really your thing…"

"Sheldon, I would love nothing better than to stay with you tonight and share your enjoyment tomorrow." Amy placed her finger over Sheldon's lip to stop him talking and felt him smile under her touch. "I like Star Wars and Star Trek **because** you like them, granted I probably wouldn't watch them on my own; but I do enjoy watching them with you." Sheldon's smile broadened at her quiet words and he knew in that instant that there was something that he just had to do.

"Amy Farrah Fowler…"

"Yes?"

"I'm going to kiss you now." Sheldon vowed solemnly and Amy smiled softly, Sheldon had kissed her briefly in the past, but it was always something that Amy had either initiated or had to prompt him to do.

"Alright, but you've kissed me before…why are you suddenly announcing it like it is the first time?"

"Because I've never really meant it before now…hold onto your socks little lady, because I'm about to knock them clean off…" Sheldon smiled widely as he gently tugged Amy closer on the mattress and plucked her glasses off her nose, leaning over to place them on the nightstand.

"Hoo…" Amy shivered a little in excitement, Sheldon had never removed her glasses before and she wondered what he would do. Sheldon cupped Amy's face gently in his hands and pressed a soft kiss on each of her eyelid, and Amy sighed softly as her eyes fluttered closed.

"Keep them closed for a while, I don't think I'll be able to do this with you watching me." Sheldon whispered as he pressed a soft trail of kisses over her cheeks until he reached her mouth. Sheldon pressed his lips lightly against Amy's at first, exactly like all of the other times; only now he gently started moving his mouth against hers, asking for something a little deeper.

"Mmm…" Amy murmured, loving the feel of this more assertive Sheldon and as her lips parted in a soft sigh, Sheldon tentatively slipped the tip of his tongue between her lips to lightly touch Amy's. He groaned slightly at the tingling sensation that rippled down his spine and Amy's arms moved up to link together at the nape of his neck as she cradled his head between her hands. Sheldon ventured a little further into Amy's mouth and felt her tongue cautiously begin to enter into play as she moved it against Sheldon's and they began to exchange breaths. Sheldon loved the taste of her minty breath, sweetened with chamomile from the tea and started to move his tongue a little deeper into her mouth, rubbing it along the edge of her teeth before withdrawing slowly and breaking the kiss.

"Okay?" Sheldon asked softly as Amy's eyes fluttered open and she smiled shyly before dipping her head, cheeks flushed with a combination of embarrassment and arousal. Sheldon chuckled a little as he pressed a finger to Amy's chin, raising her head up so that he could see into her eyes. "Thank you, Amy."

"What for?"

"For not pressuring me…I'm glad I waited for you to come into my life; that was just perfect." Sheldon dropped his head to rest his chin on top of Amy's hair as he drew her into his arms, content just to hold her quietly as they turned their attention back to the TV. Somehow it felt more natural for them both after their kiss; Amy rested her head easily on Sheldon's shoulder and his arm cradled her against his side, his fingers linking with hers as their hands rested on his waist. Sheldon glanced up as there was a faint tapping on the door and called out for Leonard to enter. Leonard poked his head just into the room and smiled softly at the sight of the pair cuddled up on Sheldon's bed; there was barely an inch between them and they were only using the one pillow.

"I going to make a drink before heading to bed, I wondered whether you wanted your usual."

"Please." Sheldon nodded and glanced down at Amy. "Would you care to join me in a glass of warm milk?" Amy wrinkled her nose up and Sheldon grinned as he tapped the tip. "What's that face for?"

"It sounds positively revolting…"

"We have cocoa…I could make you a hot chocolate instead," Leonard suggested and Amy's face brightened slightly as she nodded with a little more enthusiasm.

"Now you're talking my kind of milk."

"Two hot chocolates, please Leonard…and don't forget the mini marshmallows." Sheldon changed his mind about having plain milk and Leonard grinned, closing the door behind him as he went off to make the drinks. Sheldon glanced down at Amy and saw her smirking up at him. "What?"

"It's May, Sheldon. What happened to only drinking hot chocolate with months ending in an 'r'?"

"You made such a face at the thought of drinking plain milk…and I was hoping for a goodnight kiss a little later." Sheldon quirked his eyebrow and Amy quickly understood his meaning, giggling as he seemed suddenly so enthusiastic at engaging in an activity he used to describe as unhygienic and completely unnecessary. "What's the giggling for?"

"You!" Amy giggled again and Sheldon started tickling her to make her tell him more. "It's like you've suddenly realised that we're having a romance…"

"It only took one kiss and it's left me wanting more…you're a vixen, Amy Farrah Fowler." Sheldon murmured huskily as he stilled his fingers and gazed longingly into Amy's sparkling eyes. "What have you done to me?"

"Exactly what you've been doing to me since the day we met…" Amy replied softly as she reached up to push Sheldon's hair back from his forehead, smiling widely up at him. Sheldon turned his cheek into her palm and brushed a soft kiss against her skin.

"I think that I may just be falling head over heels for you, Amy. What do you say to that?"

"I would say…what took you so long? I've been crazy for you ever since you interrupted my movie date with Stuart…" Amy confessed with a shy grin and Sheldon pulled her into his arms, dropping soft kisses over her cheeks and mouth.

"I've changed my mind…" Sheldon murmured as he continued to hug his ecstatic girlfriend, he pulled back slightly so that she could see the truth in his eyes. "I am now absolutely certain that I am definitely in love with you Amy…just you and nobody else but you."

"I love you, too….cuddles." Amy stroked Sheldon's cheek lovingly and tugged his head to make him lower his head so that she could kiss him again. Sheldon was all too happy to oblige, capturing her mouth in a lush open mouthed kiss that was only interrupted when Leonard brought their drinks into them.

"Um…err…sorry, here's your drinks!" Leonard set the drinks down on the nightstand and didn't quite know where to look, he saw the almost dazed expression on Amy's face and the swollen mouths and knew exactly what the pair had been up do before he opened the door.

"Thank you, Leonard." Sheldon called out and somehow Leonard got the feeling that he wasn't just thanking him for the drinks.

"Penny's calling in for her dinner shortly, I think I'm gonna spend the night over at her place…I'll double lock the door when I go." Leonard turned to leave the bedroom and was halted by Amy's soft call.

"You don't have to do that, Leonard…We're not going to engage in coitus this evening, so you are perfectly safe."

"We're not..?" Sheldon's tone was positively disappointed and raised slightly at the end, almost as if he were questioning her statement. Amy squeezed his hand lightly and shook her head.

"We're going to take things at a pace that suits us both…I'd rather not face another inquisition from your Mother when she accuses me of leading her baby boy astray…don't forget I'm one of those California girls she always warned you about."

"I guess we'll just have to get hitched then…nothing she can say about us canoodling as a legally wed couple." Leonard sucked in a sharp breath at Sheldon's shock statement but as he turned around, he was surprised to see that Amy didn't appear distressed in the slightest.

"Mmm…how about the weekend of the 4th? We could have a quick ceremony here and then surprise your Mom with a visit over the long weekend?"

"Eight weeks is a long time to wait, vixen…How about next weekend instead? We can still go to Texas for the fourth if that's what you really want…but I'd be just as happy holed up in your little apartment for the holiday."

"Hold on a minute…you can't just decide to get married without thinking it through properly!" Leonard interrupted their casual conversation, "You're discussing it like you were talking about a visit to the dentist for goodness sake! Where's the proposal, the ring…heck I know the two of you haven't even kissed properly before tonight! You can't base a marriage on just that."

"Now, wait just a minute." Amy bristled at the way Leonard was acting and Sheldon rubbed her arm trying to get her to calm down a little. "Just because that's the way thousands of other people do things, it doesn't make it the right way for us. I certainly don't need some elaborate gesture and a handful of meaningless words to know how Sheldon feels about me. I can't stand the idea of a huge, lavish wedding ceremony that takes years of planning and thousands of dollars…I just need Sheldon and my dreams will be complete."

"Aww…really?" Sheldon sniffed a little at the idea and nuzzled his cheek against Amy's shoulder and she smiled down affectionately at him, dropping a kiss to his upturned mouth.

"Really…I want to marry you, Sheldon and have done for a long time. I'm prepared to wait as long as it takes for you to be as certain as I am…We can marry tomorrow, next week or even next year if you like, I'm not going anywhere." Leonard listened to Amy's heartfelt words and felt instantly ashamed for making light of their plans.

"I'm sorry guys, I guess I just let my own feelings get the better of me. Penny and I are struggling to see eye to eye on nearly everything about our wedding, and the two of you just made it seem so…easy. I'm still going to spend the night at Penny's…congratulations, I hope the two of you will be very happy together." Leonard still looked a little upset and Amy left Sheldon on the bed to give Leonard a grateful hug.

"Thank you." She whispered into his ear. "I'll take good care of him, I promise."

"I know you will." Leonard muttered against her hair and sniffed a little as he pulled back, wiping his sleeve against his eyes and coughing a little to clear his throat. "Catch you tomorrow, Sheldon. What time did you want to start?"

"I'll give you a call around mid-morning, it's around 13 hours for all six movies if you remember; but as I have no urgent desire to watch the shameless disaster of the first movie, I think we can trim that down a little."

"Good idea, I've got some work that I can catch up on until you're ready. See you tomorrow."

"Yes, goodnight Leonard." Sheldon hopped off the bed and pressed his ear against the door, waiting until he was certain that Leonard had left the apartment before turning around to grin excitedly at Amy. "I've had an idea…it's completely outrageous so feel free to reject it out of hand."

"Go on." Amy waved a hand at Sheldon to continue, and he practically vibrated with barely contained enthusiasm.

"What would you think about getting married tomorrow at the courthouse? We could head over there before it opens and queue up for an opening; grab our slot, head to the mall to pick out the rings and then go back when it's time."

"You don't believe in letting the grass grow under your feet do you, cuddles?" Amy grinned over at her now fiancé and Sheldon grinned back, racing over to pull open his dresser drawer searching for the perfect accessory.

"I'd never forget our anniversary because it's such a memorable date…and I even have the perfect tie to wear already!" Sheldon pulled out a charcoal tie with tiny Star Wars characters embroidered in the fabric.

"Hmm… that would go well with that skinny charcoal suit that Penny picked out for you when you had that fund raiser last year." Amy tilted her head to the side as she thought it over. "Okay, let's do it…"

"Really? Oh, Amy…you're the best!" Sheldon dropped the tie on the dresser and crawled across the mattress to enfold Amy into his arms. "Are you absolutely certain that you don't want some lavish wedding with a meringue dress and all the frills?"

"I couldn't think of anything I'd like less…No, just a simple civil ceremony will be ideal for me, Sheldon. No invitations or guests to worry about, just you, me and the judge. The clerk will find a couple of witnesses for us to use and we can always have a party at some other time…or not."

"Right little lady, we need to get some sleep if we want to be up and out of here in time tomorrow." Sheldon crossed over to pull out a long t-shirt and pair of briefs from his dresser, placing them on the end of the bed. "I'll go and change in the bathroom and then we'll swap over; I'll find you a spare toothbrush."

"No need, I always carry a travel toothbrush in my purse." Amy stated and Sheldon grinned as he collected his own nightwear from the dresser and headed for the bathroom. He loved the fact that Amy was willing to take everything in her stride, and he was determined to make their wedding as memorable as possible; she may have said that she didn't need any frills but he didn't know any bride that didn't at least have a few flowers at her wedding. Sheldon made a quick detour into the living room and opened up his laptop. Within a few minutes he had ordered a lavish flower arrangement that came with balloons and a bottle of champagne to be delivered to the apartment around midday and a smaller bouquet that he could collect from the local florist when they were on their way back to the courthouse. Satisfied that he had things under control, Sheldon headed into the bathroom to change into his nightclothes; humming quietly under his breath.


End file.
